Pogged and Agog with the Swadish House Pathia

Swadish is the ultimate in luxury fine dining for modern Indian Cuisine in Glasgow. Located in the Merchant City amongst a plethora of other Indian restaurants, Swadish offers a beautiful setting in which award-winning cuisine is served; will it add the much sought after, the fashionable, the sensational OCC sticker of recommendation?

The OCC is a well-respected Institution with multiple international franchises. The OCC takes pride in searching out the finest Indian restaurants and providing impartial reviews of Curry Houses all over the world. Members vote anonymously without being influenced by other members (we call this “no swaying”) on 5 categories, and an average score out of a maximum 10 is given to each restaurant we review. Restaurants must score an average of 7/10 or above to receive the OCC sticker of recommendation. All OCC members have been through a rigorous selection process to enter the Club. In short, we all know our curries.

Swadish like my friend who was run over by a steam train, should be chuffed to bits with an overall score of 9.14.

Congratulations on being awarded a coveted OCC sticker. Where will it go…?

Quality: 9.40

Value: 9.20

Atmosphere: 8.90

Service: 9.08

Customer Care: 9.12

Leaving a miserable, soaked Merchant City street to be welcomed by the staff and then the restaurant itself was like your first visit to watch your team, looks good but god you’re nervous now! Our table of 5 was positioned centrally, allowing the OCC to sample the atmosphere, but retain an element of privacy, too. Like England v Samoa at the opening of the RLWC 2021, a strong start!

Bum-bums settled, drinks ordered and we’re in the arm wrestle of an OCC meeting. Like a relieving penalty in your own 20, the poppadom and chutneys arrived to satisfied nods from the group; this is going to be a fun 80 minutes. The pops you ask? Like a Dominic Young try in the corner, delicious!

After a very tasty opening stanza, the starters of pigeon, cauliflower, tandoori salmon and lamb chops arrived and like a Tory party conference staring up at Liz Truss, the group were agog with more smiley faced head nodding.

Half time. Pint. No pie.

You want to start your second half well, a few sets and get back into the arm wrestle. No OCC, no! Massive hits straight from the whistle with servings (nicely portioned for 5) of lamb shank, Goan monkfish, audacious aubergine, classic butter chicken, some other mad chicken, sexy rice dishes and a myriad of naan to delight the OCC. OCC, OCC, OCC! The crowd are on their feet, the chants are bellowing, and stomachs are being filled with subtle spicing, punchy flavours and wonderfully cooked proteins. The Aubergine was indeed audacious, almost arrogant. Well done aubergine, you played well mate.

Ooft. Lets take a rest at this scrum. I’m pogged*.Tough boobs – here comes some free pudding.

Thank you. Bloody lovely.

Full time. What a win.

After match interview with Claire Balding gave us commentary on how snazzy the restaurant was, the wonderful service, outstanding food and for all that, after asking for a bill, expecting Clinton, we got Murray. Special mention here to the chef who was a great chat.

*Pogged: Adjective. Informal – Northern.

“By ‘eck Mam, I’ve had 9 Yorkshire puddings for me starter and I’m pogged.”

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Sadly, I have to go, I’ve accidentally booked myself onto an escapology course and I can’t get out of it.

Never apologise, never explain. Sorry, but that’s my motto.

Ps. The OCC’s door is always open, so if you know how to fix hinges that’d be great. Check out our other reviews and check back each month for the latest on the Scotland curry scene!